Tuesday, January 06, 2004

Bombastic Bad Luck:

I'm beginning to wonder; to slip my toes over into the Land of Paronia, checking rear view mirrors, throwing salt over my shoulder, packing holy water in my purse, and nervously rubbing a white rabbits tail when i'm not too occupied with knocking on wood. Something is got to give. WTF is going on?!? It's a flippin new year for Pete's sake and yet while enjoying stories of the night before adventures I missed out and the best dern pancakes in the metroplex, my poor little RAV4 was towed right from underneath my nose. It's damn Dallas I swear. This city has it out for me. Voodoo?!? I dunno...something though, seriously. And if I could attest this streak of bad luck to a 'case of scatter brain' or 'parking regulation oblivion', then maybe then, this wouldn't seem so fishy but unless it's super late at night i'm usually 'scatter brain' free and, shah, i'm way too anal to even jeopardize not having at least 3hours worth of quarters in the parking meter for an thirty minuet stop. And if it had been the first time my car had been towed from down there it wouldn't shake me in the least but it wasn't. Let me see...towed twice, boot once, broken into once, and um probably about(seriously) fifteen parking tickets, in which maybe 5 are legit and maybe 7 have been paid for.

Up until a doctor visit ago I never thought I carried stress and maybe my percieved apathetical disposition thus far has only intensified the complication-nasty introversion that has somehow just shifted my insides: a hormonal imbalance, or, so the Doc says. I feel it now, now that I know to look for it, it's twisting inside of me as I write...rambling about the impossablities and complications and deeping of the hole I sit inside that this new dilema entails/ensues. Twisting tighter. But i'm smiling and it's 75% sincere. Joy should not be derived from our circumstances but from His promise to us and His love for us, for me it's just finding the Faith to trust He will help me find the resolution to all these dilemas i'm buried underneath. And making it to yoga class tonight. Breathing in and releasing out; finding the balance to this day in the downward facing dog and after i've sweated my hair into curliness, a cupple of Shiner Bochs at Ships tonight for it's ending.

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