Thursday, July 01, 2004

it all began with mexican lasagna:

i'm aiding in the clarification of many dear souls thanks to this article . and after i get through reading this, i'm jazzed about getting to this.

every time i see the new mtv "not rated for adults" commercial i laugh myself to tears. has anyone seen the one where the old man seems to be having a heart attack-he's lying on the ground grasping at his chest as he tells his wife how much he loves her, the camera zooms in to capture the look of utter fear on the faces of the grandchildren and the son in the background calling 911. all of a sudden the old man starts to laugh; everyone is confused, the old man blurts out,"i punked you soooo good. oh you should have seen the look on all your faces". it's effin hillarious.

i went out last night for some margaritas with rachel and ended up with a new gay boy pumping me on his bike back to my car. we made silly sounds with our voices as we went over the cobblestone streets. we giggled about breakfast at tiffany's. we drank too much. we made plans for scrabble and wine. and then we went to see the 100 inevitables at the barley house. it was everything i needed and more: a million friendly faces, toby pointing with an added wink, a shot of tuaca and advise, and a cute and witty gay boy as the cherry on the top.

up until tonight, i had never desired to be any closer to the moon than i am here on earth. but as i drove home from work, it was so much more spectacular than usual- a tantalizing bright white, with the canvas behind it, so clean and blue; so vast and so curious. i felt like joe versus the volcanoe (with no volcanoe or vengenance against mother nature. just me in my car and the moon lightening up the night sky in such a glorious manner of grandioseness and lucidity that if i tried, i would be able to count the craters by name). everything about it had me wishing i could be closer-that i could go up there, and i began to regret that one day i will die without ever seeing the view from that destination; that all i will have took was the reverse image and not the experience.

my favorite section in the paper is the Discoveries/ Science Times, and in those sections, my favorite articles, the ones concerning pebbles from Mars or Saturns newly discovered moons or the (note, hypothetical) theory that the universe is expanding. i just can't get over the intricacy; and yet, how so very perfect it all fits togather. it baffles me that with technology as advance as it is, we (being a society as a whole) ignore or refuse the blantant evidence of God's divine handmanship; that we (still a whole) search for anything else to be the answer to the, already solved, equation. but this, science and god's omnioscent nature, is not my area of any laughable means. i simply noticed the moon tonight seemed bigger and brighter than i remember having ever seen it before and wished i had wanted to be an astronaut as badly as i do right now when once upon a time, life was my f'in oyster.

ohhhh to taste, not just imagine.

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